FOR YEARS, I THOUGHT I HAD A PRICING PROBLEM.
Looking back, I realize I had a stewardship and identity problem.
I hadn't yet learned how to put healthy boundaries around the value I was creating.
And every invoice reminded me of it.
My discomfort was pointing to something I needed to improve:
learning how to clearly define the work, establish healthy boundaries, and price an engagement with confidence.
Instead, projects would grow as new ideas emerged.
I'd happily keep serving.
But by the time I totaled everything at the end, I often felt guilty for what the work was actually worth.
So, I'd discount it.
Spread the payments out.
Absorb the difference myself.
My struggle wasn’t with invoicing.
My struggle was with stewardship.
Healthy pricing begins long before the invoice.
It begins with accurately recognizing the value you've been entrusted to steward.
Most conversations about pricing focus on numbers.
But I think pricing is more of an identity issue than a financial one.
Because our pricing doesn't simply reflect market value.
It reflects personal belief about the value we provide.
Looking back, I can trace many of my pricing decisions to beliefs I didn't even realize I was carrying.
Beliefs about humility.
About service.
About what it meant to be a professional.
And until those beliefs changed...
My pricing couldn't.
These are the five lies I had to unlearn.
MARIA WASN'T TALKING ABOUT EGO
Recently, I wrote about a sentence my friend Maria Keckler spoke over my life nearly nine years ago.
"Terri, I can't wait to see what happens when you finally embrace your brilliance and unleash it into the world."
At the time, I smiled.
Then quietly filed those words away.
The truth is, I had an allergic reaction to the word brilliance.
It sounded boastful.
Prideful.
Like something someone who thought a little too highly of themselves would say.
What I've come to realize is that Maria wasn't inviting me to think more highly of myself.
She was inviting me to stop thinking too little of the value I'd spent a lifetime building.
That realization changed far more than my branding.
It changed the way I think about pricing.
Because if I couldn't accurately recognize the value I'd spent years developing...
How could I ever communicate that value to someone else?
And if I couldn't communicate it with confidence...
How could I ever price it with confidence?
Recognizing the gifts, wisdom, discernment, and experience you've spent a lifetime developing isn't arrogance.
It's accurate.
And accurate recognition is the beginning of faithful stewardship.
If you consistently minimize your value...
You'll almost certainly minimize your pricing.
RABBI DANIEL LAPIN CHANGED THE WAY I THINK ABOUT MONEY
For a long time, money felt uncomfortable.
I had an unhealthy relationship with it, which totally affected how I felt about pricing.
People would be over the top pleased with the work I did for them, and then I would feel bad about sending them a bill.
Crazy, I know.
Then I encountered an idea from Rabbi Daniel Lapin that completely reframed the way I think about money.
He describes dollars as "certificates of appreciation."
The more value you create for other people... the more appreciation they willingly express in return.
That simple idea challenged one of my deepest assumptions.
Money isn't something you take from people.
It's something they choose to exchange because they believe what they're receiving is worth more than what they're giving up.
In other words...
Money isn't the purpose.
It's the evidence that value has been created.
That doesn't mean every valuable contribution is measured in dollars.
But it does mean that creating tremendous value and being compensated well for it are not competing ideas.
They're partners.
When viewed through that lens, pricing stops feeling like greed.
It becomes an honest exchange between two people who both believe they're better off because of it.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized I wasn't asking clients to fund my business. I was inviting them to invest in a transformation they genuinely wanted.
When you genuinely help someone solve an important problem, create clarity, save years of frustration, or change the trajectory of their business...
You're not taking from them.
You're creating value.
The payment simply reflects the appreciation for that value.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS CHARGE BY THE HOUR
For years, I priced my work based on the time I expected it would take.
It seemed fair.
Logical.
Even responsible.
Then I came across a simple phrase from pricing expert, Jonathan Stark:
"Friends don't let friends charge by the hour."
At first, I laughed.
Then I realized he was challenging something much deeper than a pricing model.
He was challenging what I believed clients were actually buying.
They're not buying hours.
They're buying clarity.
Confidence.
Judgment.
Experience.
A better outcome than they could have achieved on their own.
Think about it this way...
If a surgeon performs a procedure in thirty minutes because they've spent thirty years mastering their craft, are you paying for thirty minutes?
Of course not.
You're paying for the decades of knowledge, training, and discernment that made those thirty minutes possible.
The same is true for consultants, designers, strategists, coaches, and other knowledge professionals.
Clients aren't hiring us because the work takes time.
They're hiring us because they don't have the time—or the experience—to arrive at the same result themselves.
One realization completely changed the way I think about my own work.
You're not charging for how hard it feels to you.
You're charging for how valuable it is to them.
That one distinction changes everything.
The more experience you gain, the faster and better your work often becomes.
Hourly billing unintentionally punishes that growth.
Value-based pricing honors it.
THE PROFESSIONAL PARADOX
I once heard a keynote speaker share a story that has stayed with me.
After a presentation, someone approached him and offered to help with a project his company needed.
Trying to win the work, they emphasized how inexpensive they would be.
His response surprised me.
“Thanks, but we’re looking to hire a professional.”
At first, that sounds harsh.
But the more I thought about it, the more I realized what he meant.
Professionals don’t compete by being the cheapest.
They compete by creating confidence and if you price too low, it can create doubt in your value.
That doesn’t mean higher prices automatically make someone more professional.
And it doesn’t mean discounting is always wrong.
Discounting can sometimes be an act of generosity.
But when it becomes your default, it may reveal uncertainty rather than stewardship.
Because when you consistently underprice your work, you don’t simply lower your fee.
You quietly teach the marketplace how to value you.
Different people value different things.
The goal isn’t to convince everyone.
The goal is to become unmistakably valuable to the people who already care deeply about the problem you solve.
You don’t need to attract everyone.
You just need to attract your people.
YOU GET TO CHOOSE YOUR POSITION IN THE MARKETPLACE
I once heard a story about a neighborhood hair salon that had built a successful business charging $35 for a haircut.
Then one day, a national chain opened directly across the street.
They hung a giant banner outside that read:
$10 HAIRCUTS
The salon owner had a decision to make.
Should they lower their prices to $9.95 and try to win the race to the bottom?
Or should they remind people why they had chosen them in the first place?
A few days later, the salon owner hung their own banner.
It simply said:
WE FIX $10 HAIRCUTS.
I love that story because it illustrates something every thoughtful leader eventually has to learn.
The goal isn't to become the cheapest option... it's to become the obvious choice.
The salon wasn't criticizing the discount chain.
They were making a statement about positioning.
They understood that different customers value different things.
Some people are looking for the lowest price.
Others are looking for confidence, expertise, and an outcome they can trust.
The same is true for your business.
None of these companies is trying to appeal to everyone.
Each has intentionally chosen a different position in the marketplace, attracting customers who value different things.
The same is true for your business.
Some clients are looking for the lowest price.
Others are looking for the greatest expertise.
Some value speed.
Others value personal attention.
Some want a transaction.
Others want a trusted advisor.
None of those priorities is inherently right or wrong.
They're simply different.
The goal isn't to become expensive.
It's to become unmistakably valuable to the people you're uniquely equipped to serve.
When you're clear about who you serve and the transformation you create, pricing becomes much less about competing and much more about alignment.
Trying to appeal to everyone often leaves you positioned for no one.
But when your pricing aligns with the value you create, it becomes one more way your brand communicates who you are, what you believe, and who you're best equipped to serve.
It doesn't simply communicate what you charge...
It reflects what you believe about the value you offer.
Looking back, I realize I never really had a pricing problem.
I had a series of beliefs that quietly shaped how I valued my work.
I had to learn to:
That's why I no longer believe pricing is primarily about numbers.
It's about identity.
If you've read this article and recognized yourself in even one of these lies...
Don't dismiss it.
Beliefs don't stay in our heads.
They show up in our pricing.
Our marketing.
Our confidence.
Our visibility.
And ultimately...
In the impact we're willing to make.
You don't change your pricing by choosing a bigger number.
You change it by changing the beliefs that have been quietly shaping your decisions all along.
Because every business eventually grows to the level of the owner's beliefs.
That's why I no longer ask:
How little can I charge?
Or even:
How much can I get away with charging?
I ask a different question:
What price allows me to faithfully deliver the transformation I've promised?
Because healthy premium pricing isn't about extracting more or about convincing people you’re worth more.
It's about creating the capacity to give people your very best.
That's stewardship.
Brand with Bravery Reality Check
If raising your prices feels selfish...
The problem probably isn't your pricing.
It's the beliefs you've attached to money, service, and your own value.
Change the belief.
The pricing will eventually follow.
* * * * * *
If this article resonated with you, you may also enjoy Words That Changed My Life, where I explore why so many thoughtful leaders struggle to recognize the value they've spent a lifetime building.
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